So, what do I believe in then?

Updated 11/30/17

So the question came from a co-worker of mine who knows of my “faith transition” if you will. She asked, “So what do you believe then?” That is a great question. And to be completely honest, I don’t fully know the whole answer myself. But I feel like I need to really dig into that question, and be able to formulate some sort of answer. I can best do that these days by typing something out, looking for references and sources, so here we go.

            When I start to think about where I am in my belief system, I of course start with where I came from. The LDS church’s teaching consists of God (Heavenly Father), Jesus (God’s literal son), and the Holy Ghost (literally a spirit without a body, but might be able to get one after the second coming?). This is the very basic thing, 3 distinctly separate individuals, but all working for the same cause. This is something that separates the LDS/Mormons from nearly every other Christian denomination of which I am aware. Most religion, which I know of, believe in the “Trinity” or that the three members of the Godhead are literally together.

            But now, what do I believe. I want to look into a few definitions here, see if there happens to be a “label” that fits me, if there is one.

Atheist: “a person who denies or disbelieves the existence of a supreme being or beings.”

Many individuals that have gone down the same path that I am on, now seem to find themselves as atheists. That’s not the case for me. So then I looked at the definition of Agnostic.

Agnostic: “a person who holds that the existence of the ultimate cause, as God, and the essential nature of things are unknown and unknowable, or that human knowledge is limited to experience.”

That doesn’t really fit either. I do believe in a higher power. I don’t know what exactly to call that “higher power” though. The term “God” has always brought the mental image of a human looking individual, possibly sitting on a throne like the picture here. But I’m no longer sure that this picture fits with what I now find myself believing.

A topic I probably need to address sooner rather than later, what about Christ Jesus? What is my belief when it comes to Jesus? To be honest, I don’t fully know. The Book of Mormon speaks of him, but I don’t believe the BOM. How about the Bible? I have always found some things in the Bible to be just weird. There are also a lot of things that are just unable to be proven by science (Noah and the flood). So because of that, I don’t know if I believe in the Bible, and thus don’t believe in Christ. But, that is for later mental exercises, I’ll stick with “Agnostic” on the topic of Jesus Christ.

So, God. Something that I have enjoyed in my life is learning a bit about other religions. When I start thinking of God outside of the white bearded guy sitting on a throne, I start going to other ideas. The Greeks, Egyptian, Norse mythology comes to mind. Multiple Gods, each in charge of one “area” or aspect of life and existence as we know it. But I don’t see that fitting either. My “higher power” that I do still believe in is a single entity. But I can’t for sure say that it has a human form. That belief is what has led me to look at the Buddhists.

The Buddhists have a teaching, “Gripped by fear people go to sacred mountains, sacred groves, sacred trees and shrines.” They don’t believe in a God, they say, “There are several reasons for this. The Buddha, like modern sociologists and psychologists, believed that religious ideas and especially the god idea have their origins in fear.” So, they don’t believe in God, that much is established. What then to they believe in?

“We don't believe in a god because we believe in humanity. We believe that each human being is precious and important, that all have the potential to develop into a Buddha - a perfected human being. We believe that humans can outgrow ignorance and irrationality and see things as they really are. We believe that hatred, anger, spite and jealousy can be replaced by love, patience, generosity and kindness. We believe that all this is within the grasp of each person if they make the effort, guided and supported by fellow Buddhists and inspired by the example of the Buddha. As the Buddha says:
No one saves us but ourselves, No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path, but Buddhas clearly show the way. Dp. 165”

So that just resonates with me. Humanity. In the LDS church we talk of the “Light of Christ”, which I always understood to be something along the lines of a conscience or the likes. But this Buddhist belief of Humanity. A basic belief that everyone has the power to replace the bad qualities with those of love, patience, kindness. This in my mind boils down to the golden rule. Trying to be a good person. Not out of fear that a supreme being is going to smite you, but just because it is the right thing to do as a human being.

            Honestly, the more that I have looked into the Buddhist teachings, the more I like it, the more I feel something within myself that I like. The best part, it also allows me to still believe in science. Even from their teachings on the creation of the earth. It fits in line with what is called the “Big Bang Theory”.

“It is interesting that the Buddha's explanation of the origin of the universe corresponds very closely to the scientific view. In the Aganna Sutta, the Buddha describes the universe being destroyed and then re-evolving into its present form over a period of countless millions of years. The first life formed on the surface of the water and again, over countless millions of years, evolved from simple into complex organisms. All these processes are without beginning or end and are set in motion by natural causes.”

            The last thing I want to say about Buddhism, is that they do teach a profound lesson in how we should live our lives. The goal is Nirvana, pure happiness, away from pain and suffering. Pain and suffering are results of living as humans. Instead of having someone telling you what is right or wrong, you live your life “human-centered” with a code of ethics based on understanding. And that is shown in the Five Precepts which are the basis of Buddhist morality.

“The Five Precepts are the basis of Buddhist morality. The first precept is to avoid killing or harming living beings. The second is to avoid stealing, the third is to avoid sexual misconduct, the fourth is to avoid lying and the fifth is to avoid alcohol and other intoxicating drugs.”

            So, do I consider myself a Buddhist? No, not at this time at least. I am very interested in some of their teachings, and would very much like to learn more about their ways. But I don’t see myself as a Buddhist. I was originally drawn to their thoughts on a higher being that has no real shape, no beginning or end, it just, is. They allow my belief in science as well as in a higher being to come together and be at peace. And that, that is what I am truly looking for in a religion.

            So, I don’t believe in God in the normal terms. I also don’t consider myself Buddhist, even though many of their teachings align with what I feel. Where do I fit? I don’t know, but I want to keep looking.

If anyone out there has any other religions that they think I should look into, let me know. I am done with mainstream Christianity. I have learned a fair bit about both the Jewish and the Muslim faiths, and neither of them line up with my thinking. I can’t say that I know much about Hinduism, but again, I don’t feel that the multiple Gods thing really resonates with me. If you have some good sources on the basic teachings of a religion, please share with me in the comments, or on https://www.reddit.com/r/exmormon/comments/6wofqv/i_have_been_asked_by_the_dw_and_a_few_others_what/?ref=share&ref_source=link

Update- I have come across another way of thinking- Diesm. The quick and dirty on Diesm- God (or whatever you would like to call a Higher being) helped to direct the creation of the earth, but since then is hands off. There is no revelation. God doesn't answers prayers. He doesn't punish the bad, or send pestilence or any of that crap. This works with my head I think. Science still works within this system. We don't have someone watching over us, throwing or deflecting what may come our way. It also helps explain things like famine, plagues, all sorts of death and such. Because if there is a higher being that is involved in this world, he is an ass. Really, think about it. Those people who pray for help to find their keys, why does he listen to them instead of the kids praying for food, dying of starvation? The God of the Bible and the Book of Mormon (BOM) had a hand, directly or indirectly, in the killing of MILLIONS of people, men women and children. Diesm (the "cold" variety presented on Wikipedia) has God making the earth (through scientific means), and then just letting it roll on by itself. Right now, I am between this, Buddhism, and agnostic.